my name is Laila and i was born in lebanon, i am currently living in usa and i would like to share my personal experiences.

please leave comments.

i grew up in a very strict house, i had to cover myself always, i was not allowed to have any boyfriends.

when i was 15, my body really started to develop and change. i was 4`11, 90 lbs, shoulder length black curly hair and black eyes. i wore a 32 b.

i began touching myself but never inserting fingers for it would make me lose my virginity.

in my culture, if a woman is not a virgin then no man will marry her.

1 day my family went out of town to visit family. i had a test that day so i did not go with them.

i came back in the afternoon and found the house empty, i decided i would finally do it. to insert a finger, i didnt care anymore about my virginity.

i went in the bathroom and sat on the toilet. i started to rub myself, it felt good. i slid in 1 finger and i screamed very loud.

all of a sudden the door opens and it is my 25 year old male cousin. he saw what i as doing and he was shocked.

i felt so bad and embarassed, i wanted to cry. he asked me " what are you doing in here ? ".

i said " i was just using the toilet". He saw what i was doing so he knew i was lying.

He knew that i had fingered myself so i was not a virgin anymore.

i was scared that he would tell people, i stood up and begged him not to tell anybody.

He just smiled and stepped in the bathroom and closed the door.

i took 3 steps back unsure what he was doing. he said " i won`t tell anybody but you go to do something for me".

i replied " what ?, he unzipped his pants and before i knew it, i had seen a penis for the very 1st time.

he pushed me forward and i sat back on the toilet. i was shocked and shy at the same time. he rubbed his penis on my face and i felt shy.

he grabbed my chin with his hand and made me look up at his face, he said " open your mouth " and i did not knowing what he wanted me to do.

while gripping my chin, with his other hand he put his penis in my mouth. i could feel the head touching my lips and going into my small mouth.

he was 25 and i was 14 so he was a little too big for me. he put 2-3 inches in my mouth and i could feel my tongue curling back.

he went a bit deeper maybe 1 or 2 inches and i gagged, i tried to take it out of my mouth by moving my head back but he put 1 hand on the back of my head and 1 hand on my chin and gripped very hard.

i didnt know which hurt more, the bacl of my hair being gripped or his huge penis in my mouth.

i began to panic, trying to get some air, i opened my mouth as wide as i could to try to breath in air through the sides.

as i took in as much air as i could, he shoved his whole penis in my mouth until it reached my throat.

i started to gag again and i thought i was going to die. he pushed the back of my head towards his stomach and his penis was in my throat for 2 to 3 seconds.

i tried desperately for him to release me but i couldn`t. i started to wave my hands and arms in the air.

i though i was going to faint but finally he released me and i fell to the ground gasping for air.

i felt like i was very close to vomiting, i began to shed tears and cry. i was crying because i regretted that i had fingered myself and that i just had a penis chocking me.

i looke up at my couisn and asked " can i leave now please ", he said " not yet " and turned my face towards his penis.

i closed my eyes and cried, while saying " please please " he slid his penis in my mouth again making my words stop short.

i tried to push off his thighs but he had grabbed my hair. he began fucking my mouth very fast, making sure that his penis went straight down.

he went in and out very fast and i began to vomit. he did not care, he just kep his penis in my mouth while i was vomiting.

" good girl " he exclaimed and i let out a loud scream with his penis still in my mouth.

i was very scared at this point, not sure what he would do to me or what would happen to me if anybody knew what i had done.

i tried to say the word   "please " with his penis in my mouth but it was blocking my words.

more tears ran down my face as he thrusted his penis in my mouth again. everytime he would go in, i would gag.

he started to go very deep and fast but all of a sudden he started to slow down and he began to moan. i didnt know what was going on.

he pushed my head down and his penis reached the back of my throat. i gagged. at the same time, warm sour sperm filled my mouth and throat.

i didn`t know what it was but i knew it was disgusting as i swallowed what was already in my throat. i tried with all my strength to move away from him but he held my head down.

sperm slid out the sides of my mouth as i screamed and cried. he continued to face fuck me after he ejaculated forcing me to suck the remaining sperm from his penis.

he pulled out of my mouth, spit on my face and walked out. i sat there crying, humiliated with sperm in my mouth, chin and chest.

i sat there for 5 minutes crying, took a shower, got cleaned and went to sleep just hoping it was all a nightmare.

if it wasn`t, would he ever try again