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1Part 1. Ground Rules
Weddings, even the fairly small and traditional one that Meryn was planning, take time to arrange. A marriage, especially like the one between Meryn and Jeremy, which promised to be far from traditional, would almost certainly take a lifetime to fully evolve. Meryn understood this from the very start. She was exceedingly happy that she was going to spend her life with Jeremy, whom she now knew she loved beyond all reason, and who loved her, if possible, even more in return. But it was not going to be either simple or easy. Jeremy had come into her life a year ago, at least in his mind, as her slave. She had never truly considered him thus, even though that was how they had been introduced to each other by her friend Natasha, a lifestyle Domme. She had resisted accepting him as such in the beginning. But his gentle, always giving nature had charmed her. She had been further beguiled by his incredible strength of will, and determination to do things she asked of him, such as losing over one hundred pounds to prove himself, in his own mind, worthy of her. He would also deny himself the very simplest of pleasures unless he received her permission to partake of them.
At first she had thought of him merely as a helpmate, but very quickly he became a confidante and friend, and soon thereafter, her very best friend. They had come to share intimate relations, born more out of his fervent desire to give her pleasure, but she had always tried to reciprocate at least in part, in kind. They had not truly become lovers, however, until that night of the one year anniversary of their meeting, when they had finally discovered and acknowledged the deep love they had for each other, a love which they both had been afraid to declare. Now they were embarking on a journey to spend the rest of their lives together as husband and wife.
But Meryn knew that, in his heart, Jeremy still considered himself a slave. It wasn’t that she didn’t want him in part as such. It was just that she didn’t want him to think of himself as A slave, but only as HER slave. That part of him she would always accept, love, nurture and cherish. But she would want, and demand, far more from him. As her husband, she would want a partner, who would lead as well as be led, whom she could always trust to make his thoughts and desires known to her, and not just what he might believe she wanted him to think, know and do.
This, as she saw it, was her problem and her challenge. How was she to overcome Jeremy’s slave mindset, although she would always embrace his worship, adoration and devotion. How could she continue to encourage him to grow into the husband and man she wanted and needed him to be. This was not something she could just command him to do. It had to come from within him, something he wanted and needed as well, for it to be honest and real. And lasting.
Surprisingly, a hint of how she might begin to accomplish this came when she met her future mother-in-law for lunch soon after the engagement was announced.
“Meryn, I can’t tell you how unbelievably happy I am about this. For both of you.” His mother began. “But I must admit, I was beginning to be very afraid that something like this would never happen for Jeremy.”
“Why so?” Meryn inquired, although she thought she knew in part the reason.
“It has never been easy for Jeremy.” His mother sighed. “Maybe it’s because his father died before he was born, and he never had that influence. I tried my best with him.”
“You raised the most wonderful, loving, giving person.” Meryn replied.
“I know he’s all that and has always been. But you are the first woman to have ever seen that. He never really seemed to have a problem having male friends, but he never seemed to be able to connect with women at all. Before you. Maybe it was just shyness or lack of self confidence. I always taught him to honor and respect women.”
“He certainly does that and more.” Meryn smiled.
“And, of course, his weight never helped. I don’t know how you did it, Meryn. How you were able to get him to do something like that, which he had never been able to even begin to do before.”
“I asked.”
“Oh it had to be more than that.”
And it had been. At least in the beginning. It had been her challenge to him, something she had also believed he would never be able to do, which would give her a legitimate excuse to be able to part ways with him without her feeling guilty. But he had succeeded, had proven himself to her, in extraordinary fashion, by losing nineteen pounds alone in the very first week of their acquaintance. For her. Because she had asked. That had moved her more than she could have ever believed. And it had started them on the path to where they were now, which was something else she also found extraordinary and unforseen. She smiled inwardly to herself as she remembered that he had recently finally broken the two hundred pound barrier, weighing in at 195, giving him a more than one hundred pound weight loss from his start. She had told him that this was more than enough. She was perfectly happy now with the toned physique he had so laboriously attained. For her.
“It really had to be more than that, I know.” His mother continued. “Of course he did it for love of you. But I don’t think even that could have been enough for what he’s accomplished since he met you. Not just his weight. His confidence. His new success in his career. His interactions with others.” She paused. “You saw the man in him, that nobody else could see. Which even he couldn’t see or believe was there. And you helped bring him out. You did that, Meryn. For that I can never thank you enough.”
Meryn blushed. She felt she was getting far too much credit. It had always been there in Jeremy, and a lot more was still there waiting to be drawn out. Yes, she was willing to admit that she had helped. She had been a catalyst. And then she suddenly understood something more. Jeremy had grown, had become so much more in the year that they had been together, but it had happened in large part, maybe even in toto, because she had accepted him into her life as her slave. He had begun to become a more confident, accomplished person as she allowed him to continue to be her slave. Perhaps that was the clue. Maybe she could continue to use his ongoing desire to be her slave, to please her always, to spur him on to further become the man and husband she desired, and he deserved to be.
“I can’t tell you how much that means to me.” Meryn concluded sincerely to his mother. “And how much our talk today has helped me understand Jeremy a little bit more.”
Over the next several months, as they continued to live together in her brownstone as they prepared for their coming wedding day, Meryn had several opportunities to test her theory, and she used a variety of approaches. The first was the gentlest and occurred soon after her talk with his mother. She had joined him in the bedroom one evening, and began to help him fold and put away the large baskets of laundry he had just washed and dried, a job he knew she hated to do.
“Meryn,” he had said. “You don’t need to do this. It’s my job. Why don’t you go into the living room and rest.”
“My love.” She had replied. “Can’t you understand that there are times that I just want to be with you, do things with you, even if it’s housework. That it makes me happy to do it with you?” Seeing that she had captured his undivided attention, she continued on. “And that there will be times when I’ll want to do some chores by myself, just because it pleases me to know that I’m doing something for you. There may also be times,” she added, “when I’ll do something that you usually do, just because I enjoy doing it. Isn’t that what it’s all about? Being happy?”
He had no viable argument to offer. This was what it was all about for him. Her happiness. Which then made him happy. If she wanted to join him with the chores, or do some on her own, if it gave her pleasure, he would always be happy and content with that. Of a surety, she knew he would still be doing the lion’s share of the housework, and she didn’t mind that he considered all of it his ultimate responsibility. But he never again complained or seemed the least bit upset when she chipped in to help. And so she counted this encounter a success.
The next opportunity required her to be somewhat firmer. They had been discussing several of her ideas for the wedding and reception, and he had replied earnestly, “Whatever you want, Meryn.”
She stopped short.
“No Jeremy.” She sharply responded. “It’s not ‘Whatever I want’. I never want it to be ‘Whatever I want’. There will be many times in private, you can be sure, when I will demand your unquestioning obedience.” She declared emphatically. “But in the everyday world where we’ll live most of our lives, what I WILL always want from you is to know what you think, what your opinions are, even when I haven’t asked.”
She paused, then continued more calmly. “There will be times when we disagree, and I will defer to you because it might seem to me that it means more to you than to me, and I know you will do the same for me.” Far too often, she feared, unless she was vigilant. “And if there are times, when we strongly disagree, we WILL work to find a compromise. If I ever sense that you’re giving in to me on something you feel strongly about, without us attempting to find a compromise, then I will really become angry. And even worse, I will be greatly disappointed. And I know you don’t ever want to disappoint me” Which, in itself, she knew, would be his most severe punishment. “Do I make myself clear?” She added ominously.
“Yes Ma’am.” He firmly responded. She allowed herself a small smile at the appellation they had previously agreed that he could use whenever he needed to acknowledge her dominance, and his submissiveness. It wouldn’t be used often, but she would accept it when it was, for what it meant. Especially such as now, when he was agreeing to be a willing and equal participant in their decision making from now on. Because he now realized that this was what she truly wanted and needed.
Her third confrontation with an unwelcome manifestation of Jeremy’s slave mentality happened about a month and a half later, and provoked her most vigorous response. It occurred one night when they were sharing intimate love. Since the night of their betrothal, Meryn had insisted that they frequently, although not always, include intercourse in their actions. Since this would be one of his most pleasurable husbandly duties, he never saw any reason to complain. But as he had become a master at finding new and creative ways to drive her into an orgasmic frenzy using other techniques, she usually most willingly allowed and encouraged him to do so.
This particular night, Meryn had decided to belatedly explore something she had wanted to do with him for some time. She bade him to lay naked on his back on the bed. She then disrobed, climbed up to straddle his ankles on her knees, and slowly began to stoke the insides of his thighs to his groin with her hands. His manhood jutted up in front of her, thick and rock hard. She cooed to him as she licked her lips, and then slowly bent forward to begin to nuzzle, nibble and lick his eager erection.
“No Meryn. Please don’t.” He suddenly protested attempting to pull away from her. “You shouldn’t. It’s not right.”
She sat bolt upright on her heels, towering over him, initially perplexed and clearly angry. Then she understood where this was coming from. And that she had to put a stop to it. Now and forever.
“Listen slave.” She retorted hotly. “Haven’t you sworn to me time and again that I own you body and soul? Haven’t you?” She practically snarled.
“Yes Ma’am.” He whispered back.
She grabbed his now softening penis and held it firmly in her hand.
“So who owns this then?”
“You do.” He replied.
“Damn right I do.” She gripped him more tightly. “This is MY prick. Mine. Don’t you ever, ever forget it.”
He could only nod.
“If I want to suck on my prick like a baby suckles on a breast for mother’s milk, I will do so. Any time, any way I want. Is that understood?”
He nodded again.
“And I definitely want to do so now.” She paused and held his eyes with hers to make sure he got the message. “And slave, my prick better be able to produce the nourishment I want, or there will be hell to pay.”
With that she bent back down and began to lick, slurp, and deep throat her prick to her heart’s delight, until, with permission implied in her previous command, he could take no more, and he erupted into her mouth.
She held him within her until she was sure he was done, and then crawled up with a mouth full of his spunk, and French kissed him, sharing the spoils of her conquest. After several long, blissful moments of this, she pulled back and rewarded him with a smile.
“Always remember this, my love. I will take what I own whenever I want. But I will always share fully with you whatever joy I receive.”
With eyes glistening, he responded. “Yes Ma’am. Thank you. Always.”
She waited a few more seconds, clearly enjoying the moment, and then continued. “And now I think you should put what’s left of my treasure where it properly belongs.” With that she rolled onto her back, and demurely spread her legs. Needing no further encouragement, he shimmied his face down between her thighs, where he spent most of the rest of the night gloriously attempting to deposit any of the remaining seed in his mouth into her inner sanctum.
Later, as she basked in the after haze of his attentions, she reflected on what had taken place over the past several months. She really didn’t think that there would be any further protests about acts that he might believe were beneath her, or that he might feel he didn’t have any right to enjoy. Manipulating his slave mindset had clearly helped continue his development into the man she wanted, and the husband she would need. She didn’t know if this would always be the way to deal with any further issues and problems that may arise in the future. But, she mused to herself, it certainly had given them both a good start.