advanced search

List Stories

Newest Stories
Highest Rated
Most Voted
The Longest
Recent Pop
Overall Pop
List by Title
List by Author

More ...

Heretics Author: Alix
(Added on Dec 26, 2011) (This month 10255 readers) (Total 19984 readers)
Two girls are about to experiece a life changing ordeal.

Ratings and Reviews:
Number of Ratings: 3
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
0% 0% 0% 33% 33% 33% 0% 0% 0% 0%
Weighed Average (?): (5/10)
Average Rating: (5/10)
Highest Rating: (6/10)
Lowest Rating: (4/10)

Review this story: Rate It! and add review for this story
Only user can review stories


Seems you are not login.
Go to the forums to login!

then refresh/reload this page

Want to register? It's free!
Forgotten your password?


Reviewer: Major Littmann (Edit) Rating: Dec 27, 2011
I feel the incorrect word use and strange punctuation tend to mask the fact that this isn't much of a story, neither the plot nor the background to the plot are properly explained or even thought through, and the descriptions are pedestrian and plodding and as a result it is far from erotic. (4/10)
Replied by: Alix (Edit) (Dec 28, 2011)
Thanks for your input Major.

Reviewer: JimmyJump (Edit) Rating: Dec 26, 2011
Must agree with Lisa Jones, in that there's way too many homophone errors in "Heretics" to make for a comfortable read.
Quite a few spelling errors too, I'm afraid, like "server" instead of "severe" etc. .
The story itself is well written and has potential, just get everything through an editor before posting, please.
JJ (6/10)
Replied by: Alix (Edit) (Dec 28, 2011)
Sorry, never heard of a homophone mate; bit above the old pay level.
The spelling went through WORD(spell check), I see your point with server and severe; and that would anoy me too, so I'll have to work on it.
Prefer to try with my own editing, but a valid point so thanks for making it.
Thanks for your time Jimmy and your response.
Replied by: JimmyJump (Edit) (Dec 28, 2011)
Homophone is "self-sounding", or, words which sound the same but are written differently and have a different meaning (there/their, brake/break, deer/dear, etc. ...)
Okay, let me get off of my orange crate now...
And hey! at least you still get paid, which could change after you start using homonyms or even onomatopoeia *grin*
JJ
Replied by: Alix (Edit) (Jan 14, 2012)
Thanks :)
I'm with you, cheers.

Reviewer: Lisa Jones (Edit) Rating: Dec 26, 2011
Please, please, find yourself an editor. There are so many homophone errors - their/there being the main culprit - and it takes away from what could be a promising start. (5/10)
Replied by: Alix (Edit) (Dec 28, 2011)
Thanks Lisa for your input and your time. See my reply to Jimmy for homophone :)
You and Jimmy think there is something in the story and so do I.I shall go over part two and see what I can come up with/edit. I'm not in your class, your good; I'm just doing something that i thought i could never do(write), that doesn't mean I can but what the hell, I'll give it a whirl.
Thanks for your time and input Lisa, cheers.

BDSM for All
Free sex stories

(This Month)