advanced search

List Stories

Newest Stories
Highest Rated
Most Voted
The Longest
Recent Pop
Overall Pop
List by Title
List by Author

More ...

Teen Fire & Teen Frost....Torture Bot 2 Author: enigma
(Added on Dec 7, 2011) (This month 166355 readers) (Total 203205 readers)
Sister teen crime fighter are captured and tortured by a diabolical torture robot.....

Ratings and Reviews:
Number of Ratings: 4
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote 1 Vote
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
0% 0% 0% 25% 25% 0% 0% 25% 0% 25%
Weighed Average (?): (6.5/10)
Average Rating: (7/10)
Highest Rating: (10/10)
Lowest Rating: (4/10)

Review this story: Rate It! and add review for this story
Only user can review stories


Seems you are not login.
Go to the forums to login!

then refresh/reload this page

Want to register? It's free!
Forgotten your password?


Reviewer: mrfrosty (Edit) Rating: Dec 28, 2011
anyone have anything to say about the story itself....not the writing skills????? (10/10)
Replied by: Mr. Willit (Edit) (Jan 23, 2012)
Only weirdos write reviews. If you like making the story, keep making it.
Replied by: Mr. Willit (Edit) (Jan 23, 2012)
Speaking of weirdos. Part 4 seems too short. Only 1 paragraph has any real torture to it. I think you're limiting yourself by making their clothing non-removable. Consider the possibility of having the mad scientist discover a way to remove the clothing - maybe a result of running these torture tests on the teens. Might give you new avenues to explore.

Reviewer: SamCurious (Edit) Rating: Dec 21, 2011
Your story would improve with MUCH shorter paragraphs. Reading huge wodges of narrative is difficult and annoying. You could also do with someone proofing your grammar, to account for singular and plural references. Keep going and polish it as you go. (4/10)

Reviewer: Mr. Willit (Edit) Rating: Dec 9, 2011
This is a great start. I know you are doing this mainly with dragon so I don't care about punctuation and spelling. Just continue, I really want to see more of this. And you can really go extreme since you've established their invulnerability.
As for the ?boxes, it's not ur fault. Something is wrong with the site. Your best bet is to simply not use quotation marks until they fix the formatting software. (8/10)
Replied by: Curtis (Edit) (Dec 10, 2011)
It's not just the quotation marks that are being bolluxed, though. Dashes, degree symbols and others are treated similarly. The key is to find a format that isn't affected. As evidenced by other stories posted recently, these formats do exist. Demand information from the site administrator, or try e-mailing authors whose work is unaffected for further guidance.

Reviewer: Major Littmann (Edit) Rating: Dec 7, 2011
Not a bad first attempt but terrible punctuaation, those awfu boxes instead of "Quotes" and no clear idea on the part of the autor as to how the Torture bot and torture equipment works, it could have been good. (5/10)
Replied by: mrfrosty (Edit) (Dec 8, 2011)
the quotation marks were there when the story was submited don't know why they changed to boxes...sorry you didn't enjoy the story...
Replied by: Curtis (Edit) (Dec 10, 2011)
Major, do you really not understand that it isn't the authors who are putting those horrible boxes in place of the quotation (and other) marks? The site conversion software is the culprit. Some formats convert well, and other badly. What the site administrator should be doing is informing the authors of which formats convert badly.

BDSM for All
Free sex stories

(This Month)