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Little Baby
Author: ajacks
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(Added on Jan 31, 2007)
(This month 54123 readers) (Total 73109 readers) |
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Ryann was the popular cheerleader in her high school. although she was prude, she had plenty of guys hit on her. she had it all, until the schools janitor decided to change all of this... |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 6 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (4/10) |
| Average
Rating: (4/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (9/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (1/10) |
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| Reviewer:
ukanallover
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 12, 2007 |
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cant wait for the next episode! make sure it baby outfit is very cute and describe the outfitsd in detail when u do (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
25toLife
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 7, 2007 |
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Do you read your stuff before you post it? I apologize if you are too young to read it, there is no other valid explaination for this... monstrosity of a story. (1/10)
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- Replied by:
ajacks
(Edit) (Feb 14, 2007)
- Thank You.
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| Reviewer:
azrlg17
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 4, 2007 |
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Not only is the spelling and grammar atrocious but the janitor catches the girl with chloroform, shaves her, cuts her dress and then releases her and she doesn't notice afterwards??? No, I really don't think so. And the shift key is your friend. Use it. (2/10)
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- Replied by:
ajacks
(Edit) (Feb 14, 2007)
- Thank You
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| Reviewer:
chksng19
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 4, 2007 |
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Lots of concerns with your "first story", ajacks. Sentences begin with capital letters, end with periods. Even in conversations! Your is not an abbreviation for 'you are'. That would be, "you're".
Many other things, too numerous to mention. It might be worth having your story checked by someone who writes English, and try again. I wish you luck. (2/10)
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- Replied by:
ajacks
(Edit) (Feb 14, 2007)
- Thank You.
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| Reviewer:
Rocky
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 1, 2007 |
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An old, over-used plot, but my real complaint about it is really a question: Is your caps key broken? (4/10)
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- Replied by:
ajacks
(Edit) (Feb 1, 2007)
- first story, sorry
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| Reviewer:
Panther007
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 31, 2007 |
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Could use a bit of work on the format, and it seemed that the janitor was referred to as male at one point. I like the premise and set up and with a little work could turn out to be a good little story. (4/10)
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