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New Boarder
Author: Pallidan
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(Added on Aug 20, 2005)
(This month 53282 readers) (Total 63017 readers) |
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A woman moves to town and finally finds a place to rent but finds out the family has a weird lifestyle. Will be continued in the months ahead. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 3 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (6/10) |
Average
Rating:  (6.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (7/10) |
| Lowest
Rating: (6/10) |
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| Reviewer:
Lady Lance
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 25, 2005 |
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One of the problems I've always had with your work is that I get the feeling that you write until you're bored, and then you end it. This results in stories ending in awkward places.
That being said, after suspending a lot of disbelief (why the heck would they board out of a room, when in the real world it'd be an invite to call child protective services on that family, but I digress?) this is a bit better than most of your work. (6/10)
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| Reviewer:
Samantha
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 23, 2005 |
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I liked the concept very much and it was easy to read and understand what was happening. I do think that the imagery could be enhanced by describing the rooms, more detail in how the mum and dad were standing etc. EG :Donna took a quick shower and reviewed her surroundings with gleam. The room
was really nice and the bath was great." More description of her surroundings would have helped the reader get into the mood of the story more. I found, without the setup of imagery, things seemed to happen too fast Overall, a great deal of potential in this story. Well done Pallidan. (6/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 20, 2005 |
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need to see and read more to adjust my review and rating (7/10)
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