|
|
|
|
|
9725
Author: Zenar
|
| |
(Added on May 14, 2005)
(This month 76156 readers) (Total 129499 readers) |
| |
A girl is kidnaped while on vacation and send off to a secret location to be prepaired for sale as a slave. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 9 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| 1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
10 |
| 0% |
0% |
11% |
0% |
0% |
11% |
56% |
11% |
11% |
0% |
|
Weighed
Average (?):  (7/10) |
| Average
Rating: (7/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (9/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (3/10) |
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
jip
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 9, 2006 |
| |
Description is good but a little too long. (7/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
oosa
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 21, 2005 |
| |
I disliked the changes in tense and the style of writing. (3/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
redEva
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 6, 2005 |
| |
Only reason I did not give you 10 is because of the mistakes that could have been avoided by proofreading, though to be honest – I was to busy being aroused to worry about spelling.
Love the story, love the enhancements, and the vocabulary. More, more, more! Please
(9/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
Rocky
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 17, 2005 |
| |
I agree with the other reviewers that the story is an imaginative one, but would be much more enjoyable without the misused words. I found myself actually looking for them after the first half dozen or so ("air born"...she was born in the air...or "airborne," meaning she was aloft in an airplane) and this certainly detracted from my enjoyment of the story. I highly recommend the use of a proofreader or editor (a real person, not a computer check) before posting subsequent chapters. Worthy of a higher score if not for the language issues. (7/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
Mad Lews
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 15, 2005 |
| |
Lots of good ideas, plenty of imagination but the story realy suffers from poor graammer and missuse of words. (see chksng19's comments) it is to bad because you have the makings of a great story here. don't be shy find someone to proof read it for you and get that next chapter out. (7/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 14, 2005 |
| |
it was a good read but nothing spectacular (6/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
Engineer
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 14, 2005 |
| |
A new and very exciting story plot. The narrative also good, but it urgently needs some spell checking and editing to enhance readability. I hope for soon completion of this promising work. (7/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
chksng19
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 14, 2005 |
| |
An interesting tale, with some truly clever touches. Needs checked by a human editor, though: she does not "ware" clothes she "wears" them, and so on. These spellchecker errors are common. An editor will catch them for you.
A good start! Looking forward to the next chapter. (7/10)
|
|
|
About 