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Lucy's Lesson
Author: AtHisWhim
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(Added on Aug 23, 2004)
(This month 9145 readers) (Total 20132 readers) |
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Lucy is forced to endure an unwelcome visitor, but is he really as unwelcome as she thinks? |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 2 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (6.5/10) |
Average
Rating:  (7/10) |
| Highest
Rating: (7/10) |
| Lowest
Rating: (7/10) |
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 11, 2006 |
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i commend you for a good first story, altho i wish it was longer, for a new post and a new author is see great effort here, I hope to see other psots in the future and good luck withyour writing (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
Alex Bragi
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 24, 2004 |
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This isn’t the most original story theme I’ve come across, but particularly for the author’s first attempt, it’s pretty darned good. Good opening paragraphs to hook the reader, believable dialog, intriguing interaction between characters, and a nice ‘twist’ ending.
There are a few little hiccups that should have been ironed out, but nothing too drastic. The main thing that I noted over and over was missing punctuation. Personally that doesn’t really bug me but, since it will really irk some more pedantic readers, the author probably should have checked more carefully. I think too descriptions of the characters, in addition to his blue eyes, would have made this story more appealing.
(7/10)
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- Replied by:
SummerMagic
(Edit) (Aug 25, 2004)
- LOL thankyou for the kind words. My punctuation has always been a bugbear! I have an English Degree but sadly they mark on content rather than basic disciplines nowadays! Anyway, your encouragement has persuaded me to post another of my stories in so many thanks x
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