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From Queen to Sexslave
Author: Evil Misstress
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(Added on Jul 23, 2004)
(This month 20229 readers) (Total 43472 readers) |
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A young Queen comes up with a plan to take another kingdom so she marries their very young prince. But unknown to her the young prince is more than he seems and pulls a switch on her taking her kindom and making her his sexslave and prisioner for life. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 5 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (3.5/10) |
Average
Rating:  (3/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (7/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (2/10) |
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| Reviewer:
JimmyJump
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 7, 2010 |
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I'm beginning to wonder what kind of English I speak, as I didn't have too much trouble following this story. Granted, the tone is a tad childlike, as if we're dealing with a fairy-tale...errr... Sorry. It *is* a fairy-tale...
I agree with Lahrling about the missing of the transformation, but for the rest "From Queen To Sex Slave" is a fair read.
The writing could use some polishing, but not to the extent of sending Evil Mistress back to English Class.
Run-on sentences and the lack of punctuation marks, for instance, are a real nuisance and make it hard to have a fluent read.
These kind of stories aren't my cup of tea. Not even my mug of mead. A good effort nevertheless.
JJ (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
lahrling
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 25, 2004 |
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This story gets a low rating, but I want to be encouraging because the story itself is pretty good, it just needs a lot of work.
First of all, it seems to have been edited by spell check. We have 'thrown' meaning past of 'throw' consistently for 'throne' meaning royal chair.
Second, the transformations of the two unfortunate victims occur off camera and are really the whole point of the story. It restricts the motion and drama.
Third, the author telegraphs too many of her blows. More suspense coulds be introduced.
Fourth, don't you think a lover would notice an empty ballsack in the sack? It's pretty fuckin obvious.
This story needs expansion and reworking. Its overall plot is quite good and shows some real imagination and truly twisted sensibility. (2/10)
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| Reviewer:
bisarah
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 24, 2004 |
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Well, i think the idea of this story has great possibilities. However, the awful grammar and sentence structure was so poor, one could not really follow the story. Perhaps if it was cleaned up it would be a good story. (2/10)
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| Reviewer:
Engineer
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 24, 2004 |
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Terrible grammar, spelling and structuring makes the story a pain to read. The content ist also somewhat silly, although some nice ideas would habe potential. (2/10)
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| Reviewer:
lex ludite
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 24, 2004 |
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Evidently the author slept through high school english, and is unaware that the english language has certain rules for spelling and grammar. The writing is so incomprehensible that it is nearly impossible to follow the story, which may or may not have a clever ending, and may or may not generate sufficient amounts of heat to overcome the handicap of terrible writing. The author would have done better to tell her story to someone and then let them try to put it into some kind of intelligible form. (2/10)
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