Chapter 3. Early days
After breakfasting together, Jayne returned to college and started to repeat an
earlier experiment. It was to be the last of the series of four she had to
perform to confirm the results. It was now routine and she could let her mind
wander to the events of the previous night. Late in the afternoon she went to
Don's office and found him writing a note on his computer. She asked him how he
got on with the head. "Unless I give them a public apology, they are going to
ask the board of governors to terminate my employment. As the board are nearly
all academics, I could well lose this job although they may find it hard if I
take them to a tribunal. That I would do especially as it would take time and by
then I might be ready to set myself up in business. I'm writing my public
apology now but it might not be quite what they expect." Don pulled her close
and they kissed. "Will you come home with me tonight?"
"Would you really mind if I didn't? I've tried to think things out all day, but
spoilt the first experiment so had to do it again. At the moment I am very
confused. May I spend tonight in my room and come to you in the morning? Will
you be home tomorrow? It's Saturday."
"I shall miss not have you tied up in bed with me," Don's eyes twinkled, "But
yes, try and sort things out for yourself and do come to me at any time during
the day or even in the night."
Donna passed Jayne in a corridor and called out cattily, "What's it feel like to
be a woman now?" Jayne tried to ignore the comment but Donna turned and held her
by the arm. "I asked you a question slut."
"And I chose to ignore it." Jayne's voice was icy.
"Without my help you would not have felt the delights of having a man's hard
prick inside your tiny virgin cunt."
"And with your help I lay there scared to death for hours, not knowing where I
was or what was going to be done to me. I could easily have died. Thanks for
your help."
"Well, it seems Don not only put his prick in you, he put some courage as well,"
Donna muttered as they parted.
Jayne lay on her bed for a long time that evening weighing up her actions. Last
night had changed her life totally. Most girls work up to losing their
virginity, she had gone from shy girl to woman in an hour or two. She'd moved
from being completely alone to being in love. Or was she? Was it love? Was it
lust? Passion? What was the difference? Midnight came and she made herself a mug
of Horlicks. "It's supposed to help you sleep," she told herself. In the end she
took two sheets of paper and put down all the pro's to continuing the
relationship on one and all the cons on the other. Her scientific training came
in handy when she tried to evaluate the options but in the end the decision
wasn't the result of more pro's than cons. It was a simple choice as put in the
lines of some song she half remembered, "Is it better to have loved and lost
than never to have loved at all?" Having made the decision, she dropped off to
sleep for a few hours.
She awoke, it was a little before six o'clock and just beginning to get light.
Dressing and packing a small bag she walked to Don's house. There uncertainty
hit her. Should she ring the bell? For ten minutes she stood at the gate until a
passerby asked if she was alright. Looking up she saw a leer on his face and
decided she was vulnerable standing in the road. The man had only moved on a few
yards before stopping and watching.
To her it seemed like ages before the ring was answered, yet Don had hastily
donned a robe and almost immediately gone downstairs. Don, immediately the door
was shut, kissed her and guided her to the bed. Both naked again, they fucked
hard even though Jayne still felt sore from the previous day. For a while
afterwards both lay still until Don again asked about her childhood.
"For as long as I can remember," Jayne started hesitantly, "We have lived in an
isolated farm cottage. Our nearest neighbours were over half a mile away and we
were about eight miles from my school. Both my parents were very reluctant to
meet people and kept me from having friends over. It was many years before I
found out why. Father had been involved in a car accident where a small child
had been killed and as a result he'd served some time in prison. It was a fear
that this would become common knowledge now they had moved that made them keep
their previous life secret even from me. Mother would take me the whole way to
school on the back roads even though she could have driven me the one and a half
miles to the main road where I could get the school bus. We always arrived only
a few minutes before the start of class and she was there ready to pick me up
when school finished. I was not allowed to attend any after school activities
and consequently never had any real friends. Mother even caused a rumpus at
school one day when the whole class was given detention. Another mother and her
strolled into the room and ordered me and the woman's boy to leave despite
protests from the teacher. I was humiliated when mother told teacher, "If Jayne
has done something wrong, tell me and I will see her bottom is well chastised
but you will not disrupt our lives by keeping her after school." We had a letter
from the headmaster about it but no more was ever said."
"Were your parents kind to you or did they beat you?" Don asked.
"In many ways they were very kind but father believed in discipline and I was
spanked when he thought in necessary and on three occasions he used his belt.
Always though it was properly done. Nothing sexual. I would be laid over his lap
and my skirt lifted but always my knickers were left on. Afterwards I would be
made to say I was sorry and he would give me a hug and kiss my forehead. Then I
knew it was over and the incident wouldn't normally be mentioned again.
They were very supportive in my school work. Father always insisted on seeing my
homework after I had finished it and if it wasn't good enough, he would make me
do it again. My teacher often commented on the number of times I had done a
piece of work. Father also made me explain it all to him in words he could
understand. He didn't have a real education but was quick to learn. If he
couldn't understand my work or essay he would make me re-write it until he
could. That actually stood me in good stead when writing up projects later on.
Because mother and father insisted on keeping our family affairs completely
secret, I became fearful of saying anything to the few girls I could almost call
friends. I only met them at school. At weekends I was completely on my own,
except for my parents of course."
"Is your submissiveness just the result of being dominated and disciplined by
your father? You said their was nothing sexual about your punishments," Don
asked.
"Not entirely. On Sunday mornings I often walked across the fields to a farm
house only about half a mile away, to get our weekly supply of eggs and
sometimes a rabbit. Always it was the farmer's wife who came to the door and
usually I went into the kitchen to get the eggs but never stayed to chat. I was
nearly sixteen when one Sunday I noticed a plastic bag thrown in the hedge. In
it were three books. All were what you would term BDSM books where the heroine
was forced to submit to pain and sexual abuse by one or more masters. I secreted
the books and managed to get them into my room unnoticed and hid them in the
space under the bottom drawer of my dresser. I read them at night under the
bedclothes and ...."
"And played with yourself." Don finished for her. Jayne nodded. "You imagined
yourself as the heroine?" Again she nodded. "Did you do anything about it?"
"Not for a while but I kept wondering if pain would give me more of a climax.
One day I deliberately annoyed my father and so he would spank me. It was his
usual hard over the knee spanking but on top of my knickers. It was hard enough
to make me cry and afterwards I did go to my room and played with myself but
couldn't really get off because I was certain, Dad would come in and have a talk
with me. Which he did. So I was left frustrated until bedtime and by then I just
had some tenderness left. It wasn't what the books described. It wasn't being
forcibly held down, whipped and raped purely for sex."
"Do you still have the urge to be whipped and forcibly raped?"
"Don, I really don't know. Last night worked out fine but whether I could stand
being beaten first, I don't know. Much might depend on how severe it was and who
was doing it."
"Donna must have known about your fantasies," Don remarked.
"I don't know how. I've only ever spoken to Donna on work matters."
