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Chapter 35: Switched or not
If Mistress Dominique was surprised to have Mariah back so soon, she gave no indication. She listened, with her fingers pressed together and her fact blank, to Master Griffin's somewhat outraged explanation. When he curtly refused Mistress Dominique's offer of a replacement, she nodded in acquiescence, and stood to open the door for him.
As he walked away Mistress Dominique turned to Mariah, who stood in standard position before her, legs apart, hands behind her neck, elbows back. Although Mariah properly looked down, there was defiance in her stance. Why hadn't she fallen to the floor, tearful, begging for mercy? Again the doubt about her -- that the girl was unnatural.
But then Mistress Dominique was struck by a thought. Maybe Mariah didn't beg for mercy because mercy was the last thing that she wanted. And therefore the first thing that she needed. Mistress Dominique made up her mind.
"I'm not sending you back to the training center," she said. Mariah nodded to indicate that she had heard, but made no response. She had not been asked a question. "I'm giving you a gift, instead." Again, Mariah nodded. Mistress Dominique was impressed by her refusal to even look up. She knew it was more willpower than training.
She continued, "I'm sending you to a pansy." This time a quick intake of breath with the nod. "His name is Master Townsend. If you behave . . ." She cut herself off. "You may thank me."
"Thank you, Mistress," Mariah said. That flare of hope, quickly suppressed.
***
"Master, where's Mariah?" Gabriel woke at Rose's puzzled question to Animal. The two of them were crossing the meadow towards him. The sun was more than halfway across the Western sky. He had been asleep for hours.
Where was Mariah?
Gabriel meant to spring up, but his limbs were stiff from the hard ground and he couldn't get his footing immediately. Animal scrambled to the top of the boulder and looked in all directions. To Gabriel's upraised eyebrows he shook his head. He climbed down. Stunned, Gabriel circled around as if Mariah might appear out of the ground.
Animal crossed the meadow to him. "I thought she might pull something. I meant to talk to her this morning," he muttered.
Gabriel looked up, and Animal recoiled from the expression on his face. "You meant to talk to her?" he said, his voice hard and loud and incredulous. "Why didn't you watch her? You knew I'd been up all night with Margolit."
Where was Mariah?
Animal took a step back, his hand up. "What? No, I didn't! You didn't tell me. You should have asked for help."
"I did!" Gabriel was shouting now. "I asked you to drive the buggy so I could sleep, and you . . ." He was shaking. "You said no!"
Animal breathed out hard, even as his eyes scanned the horizon. "I can't read your mind, Gabriel. I didn't know you were tired." He scowled and looked at his friend. "And why were you up all night anyway? You're not the only healer in Riviera, you know."
"I may as well be!" Gabriel snapped. "I'm the only healer in your forsaken home who was willing to be roused out of bed to save the woman's life." He added, viciously, "Just like I'm the only one of us who was willing to drive the buggy!"
Where was Mariah?
"That's not true!" Animal's voice was low now. "You take it all on yourself and then you tell yourself no one else will step up. You . . ."
But a movement from Rose stopped him. She fell to her hands and knees between them, pressing her forehead into the ground. "What?" Animal demanded, his voice tired, worried.
Rose kneeled up. Into the silence she pleaded, "Masters, . . ." She looked up. "We have to . . ." She stopped, took a deep breath, and continued, "We have to look for her." She threw herself down again, her forehead touching the ground.
Gabriel deflated, the anger gone out of him as suddenly as it had come. "Please, Rose," he said tiredly. "Don't do that." Rose again kneeled up. She quickly wiped her eyes.
Gabriel spoke softly, almost to himself. "It's as she said about the other runaways. She took her chance."
"No!" Animal said harshly. "She'll die out here. You know it even if she doesn't!"
Gabriel and Animal looked at each other for a long moment. Gabriel dropped his eyes first. He said brokenly, "My sister could track her maybe, but I . . ." He stopped suddenly and put his hand to his forehead to shade his eyes. "She's coming!" he said. "And with bags full of your flowers!" He ran to meet her, Animal and Rose right behind.
Mariah stopped, startled. When the others drew near she handed to Animal the bags she carried. "Here," she said evenly. "I found another meadow."
Gabriel stood still for a moment, stunned. Then he grabbed Mariah and pulled her into a hug, which Mariah bore stoically. "I was so worried. I thought that . . . we thought you . . . I thought you'd run away," Gabriel finally said into her shoulder.
Mariah stiffened, and she pulled away. "Well, I didn't," she said. She turned away, her face burning.
Animal snorted in disgust. Gabriel grabbed Mariah's arm. "Stop," he said shakily. When Mariah merely stood there, he said, "Mariah, I need you to . . ." He took a deep breath, looking from her to Animal and back again. Another breath. Mariah stared at his boots. "My heart can't take any more moments like that." Still she did not look up. "I want you to give me your word you won't run away, not while you're under my protection."
Mariah met his eyes at last. "Of course, Master, I promise," she said coolly.
"No!" Gabriel said. "Don't toy with me. Swear it, by . . ." But he could think of nothing she could swear by. He squeezed her arms. "Give me your word," he said softly. "Your true word, and I'll believe you."
Mariah didn't react for a moment, and then she seemed to shrink into herself. She paled, and opened her mouth and closed it. There was anguish in her face, and she shook her head minutely, as if against her will.
Gabriel sighed, defeated. "Of course you can't," he said.
But Animal burst in, "Of course she can. And she will." He turned to Mariah. "You owe him that," he said. When Mariah merely stared at him, he added slowly, as if she were stupid, "for everything he's done for you."
The anguish on Mariah's face disappeared, replaced by hardness and anger. "I owe him nothing!" she spat. "He said I would be safe, and then he led the hunters straight to me." She pointed at the boulder, and looked at Gabriel, shrieking now. "There, that's the safe haven you gave me! The place where I cowered when the dogs came! You sent them to me!"
Gabriel flinched, but after a moment he said calmly, almost but not quite aloofly, "It's your choice to still believe that." He walked towards the buggy, stiffly arranging the horses, looking at no one. When Mariah started to climb onto the front bench he said shortly, "Sit in back, Mariah. I just can't look at you right now."
***
Mariah watched Master Townsend exhale smoke through pursed lips, sigh contentedly, and sink back into his armchair. He would be oblivious for a while. Mariah took advantage of the opportunity to scratch her scalp, which itched, as did the rest of her. How long had it been since she'd had a shower? She couldn't remember.
And of course the worst itch of all, between her legs. Sometimes on an errand she would purposefully cross a master in the hope that he would notice and fuck her. Usually she was subtle. Eye contact, or failing to keep an appropriate distance. Sometimes in desperation she would go further, tripping in front of him or jostling him. Most ignored her. A few would slash her with a whip. But two had fucked her. The one last week had seemed to notice her desperation. He had taken her to a side hallway and had her up against a wall. He took his time, touched her clit with his finger, made sure she was satisfied. She didn't know his name. Dark skin, lithe, a kind face. Thinking of it now increased her discomfort.
Master Townsend opened his bloodshot eyes. Taking a deep breath, she put down the feather duster and approached him, prostrating herself before him. It took a moment before he noticed her. "None of that now," he said with the smile that made Mariah shiver with loathing. "You know you can talk to me."
Mariah kneeled up. Boldly she put her hand on his knee. "My lord," she began, as Master Townsend brought the joint to his lips again, "please, let me do my duty to you. Let me service you."
Master Townsend inhaled, held his breath, and exhaled. Putting the roach in an ashtray, he removed Mariah's hand from his knee. He shook his head sadly. "Now, now," he said, and paused. Mariah wondered if he was trying to remember her name. "You know I'm a pansy. I promised you when you came here I wouldn't oppress you, and I won't."
"Master, I want to fuck you," Mariah burst out in frustration. "I need to, please."
But Master Townsend just patted her on the head. "You only think that," he said. "It's all in your head. You need to overcome your upraising."
Mariah sighed. He was off again. His story of how a long time ago there were no slaves, until war and environmental degradation led some to sell themselves, their children, to others. "It's all random, you know?" Master Townsend said. Mariah mouthed along with him, but he didn't notice. "I could be you and you could be me."
She dared to interrupt him. "Could I go to the exercise yard, my lord?" she asked. "I won't exercise, I promise. I just want to shower . . ."
But he had already shaken his head. "Let your body reach its natural state," he said, leaning back, closing his eyes.
***
When Rose had finished loading the wagon Animal indicated to her to sit in front with Master Gabriel. He climbed in back. Mariah was on the wagon floor, her back against its side, her arms hugging her knees. She stared straight ahead. Animal sat next to her and opened his sketchbook as the wagon began to roll forward. He looked up when Gabriel spoke with the gatekeeper, but as there were no comments about Rose he returned to his sketching in the fading light.
After a time Mariah looked over to see what he was drawing. The field, the boulder, Gabriel's prone figure, sleeping. She looked away quickly, but Animal had caught her movement. He said to her, softly so that Gabriel and Rose could not hear, "He won't stay mad."
Mariah colored. "You think I care?" she hissed.
Animal shrugged and said placidly, "It's nothing to me, Mariah." He continued to sketch, his hand flying over the page, filling in details.
Mariah watched him without really seeing. The light continued to fade, and Gabriel lit a couple of lanterns. Animal sighed softly and put his pencils away.
"My ribs aren't healed," Mariah said.
Animal said, when Mariah did not continue, "Gabriel said it would take six months. It's only been three."
"It would hurt to climb a tree," Mariah said.
"Well, yes, I would think so," Animal said. "You're not supposed to pull with your arms."
"So I wouldn't be able to escape from dogs, or . . . " Mariah fell back into silence and then added, in a fierce whisper, "I still know it's a mindgame!"
"Of course you do," Animal said. "And I appreciate the blooms you brought me no end." He couldn't see Mariah glaring at him in the dark, but he could feel it, and snorted.
Mariah scooted towards the back of the wagon and deliberately looked away from him, over the dark fields.
Animal shrugged. He called to the front of the buggy, "Gabriel, if you show me what to do I can drive for a while."
"That's not necessary," Gabriel said stiffly.
"Nevertheless," Animal said, "I want to."
Gabriel pulled back on the harness, bringing the horses to a stop. He turned and looked at Animal. He nodded. "Very well," he said. "I could use the help."
Mariah turned to watch Animal clamber to the front. As Rose stood up to make room, Mariah saw her slyly pat his butt. Animal smiled and whispered something to her before she climbed to the back and sat on the floor next to Mariah.
"What's going on with the two of you?" Mariah asked, not bothering to keep her voice low. "You've been going at each other all day."
Rose shrugged, and smiled, but didn't answer. Instead she said, "I'm glad you're here."
Mariah scowled. "It's still a mindgame," she said, deliberately loud enough for Gabriel to hear.
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