From: cowgirl [cowgirl_stupid@excite.com]
Sent: March11ÈÕ2001ÄêSunday 12:15 AM
To: webmaster@bdsmlibrary.com
Subject: Professor Pamela (pt.2 of 5)
Professor Pamela Panty Sniffer (2 of 5)
(F/F, humil., professor/ student, panty fetish)
By Professor Christina
(edited and proofed, by cowgirl)
This is PART 2 a very subtle 5 part story of a university professor who
manages to explain and rationalize her bizarre repressed sexual obsession
with one of her female students underwear. This story was written by a woman
who I believe was a real professor. She provided me with these letters,
asking me to help her edit them, then unfortunately disappeared before we
were finished. I have shaped them as best I can
into a sex story as she asked, adding a beginning and ending, but the
letters more or less her own voice. It starts slow, but is worth it. See the
excerpt below for a tease.
- cowgirl
*****
To put it more simply, digging your professor's panties our of her hamper,
and urinating in them was your way of saying to an authority figure, "I can
get to you, on your own territory, uncover your most private, intimate
possessions and show you what I think of you by "pissing"
(pardon the vulgarity) on it and, thereby, you.
****
Pam's 2nd Letter to Cindy
Cindy,
Am I being presumptive in addressing you by your first name? I hope not,
but
I'm not sure. As I indicated in my earlier email to you, I try to make it a
professional rule to treat students as adults. This includes, as a simple
matter of courtesy and respect, making a point of asking students permission
to call them by their first names, especially students for whom I serve as
faculty advisor, and counsel, where, not only professional matters, but also
matters of a more personal and emotional nature are often discussed.
Such more personal and matters can, of course, be quite upsetting and
distressing, even embarrassing, and I try to be helpful as I can. But, as I
said in the earlier email, it's important to be careful in crossing
professional and boundaries, in blurring them, where, not matter how
well intended we are, things can get confusing and even hurtful.
I never received a response from you to my earlier email.
And, though I've seen you on campus several times since, and even last night
when you dropped in unexpectedly at my house to use the bathroom then
rushed out so quickly! It seems, for some reason or another, that we
haven't
had much of an opportunity to speak about the issues discussed in that
email.
I hope you found it helpful, my previous letter I mean, (although I'm sure
the
bathroom was a welcome relief as well.) It took me a long time to write it
and
I said more than I intended. It was rather long, I know, and I hope you had
the
time to read it and it didn't try your patience.
In these days of multi-media immediacy and so many audio and visual stimuli
competing for your attention, students of your generation are typically less
interested in plain, bland print media and impatient about simply reading
things, without external stimuli directly engaging their other senses,
enabling them to also see, hear, smell and touch them, for a more sensually
saturated and rich experience. Of course, as I'm sure you've heard,
professors and teachers in general find this all very frustrating their
students' impatience, short attention spans, and general aversion to reading
and abstract ideas in the absence of other, more directly sensual, stimuli.
As a teacher and scholar with a love and passion for the printed word and
abstract ideas, I often find it frustrating as well. But on a more personal
level, I too, find other media and more sensual stimuli seductive; and, on a
professional level, as a psychologist, its my good fortune to have the
conceptual tools to be able to clearly understand how and why students are
impatient with the simplicity of the written word or complexity of abstract
concepts in the competing presence of so much other, more intensely
interesting communication, so much external, more sensually compelling
stimuli, and such sophisticated media to deliver it so immediately to us.
In fact, that's one of the most intriguing and perplexing paradoxes of our
age - the immediacy of media. Like this email, for instance, which can be
sent and received instantly. Of course, even this electronic
communication - email, specifically - for all its immediacy, lacks the
components of sight (or at least direct sight of anything but written
symbols), and of sound, smell and touch. So, for all its immediacy in speed
of symbolic communication, it's limited in other forms of sensual immediacy
that would give it more intimacy.
Still - and here's another intriguing, perplexing paradox about symbolic
communication and media, closely interconnected with the first - the very
lack
of other kinds of sight, and of sound, smell, and touch - can not only take
the multi - sensory immediacy and intimacy out of email, but it can also
make
it possible to actually be more intimate through email. And this is so
precisely because the lack of those other sensory components makes it seem
like a safer, more protected and secure, communication (barring email
snooping and theft, of course) than one in which the other person is more
directly present, and can identify you, see your appearance and gestures,
hear your voice, smell you, etc.
This is very abstract, I know. And I'm sure I'm trying your patience
already. But it was my way of leading into, and trying to explain two
things, which are the primary reason for this email to you. First, that
email can often feel like a more personally and emotional safe and secure
way
to communicate difficult things. It is more impersonal than speaking
face-to-face, which, ironically, can make it easier to be more personal and
intimate about things we'd have difficulty talking about in person,
especially emotional things, things that are too upsetting or embarrassing
to
talk about in person.
That was the first point. The second point is that humans are, by nature,
and enabled by their brains, inherently social, communicative and symbolic
creatures. To simplify things a bit, we are always saying things to each
other - sending and receiving messages - in complex, symbolically encoded,
ways. Of course, once we learn language and learn to talk, talking ot each
other is one way. And, once we learn to read and write, that is another.
And, as I discussed briefly above, our media for symbolic communication has
gotten very complex and sophisticated, especially electronically, engaging
many of our senses for receiving external stimuli.
But all kinds of other things, too, can be unique media for symbolic
communication and sending messages, including things we don't always
consciously recognize as communication media, even though they are. For
instance, graffiti on walls of buildings - the buildings weren't intended
for
that kind of communication, but they can be used that way to send messages.
Of course, although some owners of buildings don't mind, even encourage,
signs (for advertising, for instance) on their buildings, they are usually
not fond of, and often offended by, graffiti on their building walls, and
the
appropriation of their wall for what they consider inappropriate, even
visually despoiling and polluting, perhaps vulgar or obscene, messages.
As I alluded to in the earlier email, clothing is also a medium for symbolic
communication that enables us to send messages to each other through what we
wear, how we wear it and whatever else we may do with it. This can include
the items, colors, styles, textures of clothing and all the symbolic
messages
each of these send. And of course, businesses take commercial advantage of
our proclivity for message-sending, with not only direct advertising, but
indirect advertising of visible name brands and other symbolic messages on
T-shirts and other clothing. Moreover, people not only buy clothing, and
other message - sending things, but also can, themselves, appropriate
material,
including clothing, in inventive ways, to send their own personal messages,
often in quite imaginative, creative forms.
Many times, messages are so imaginative and creative, people don't even
notice them, or don't understand the messages when the do, or misunderstand
the message, perhaps taking offense when none was intended. In fact,
symbolically encoded messages are complex, and people are not always
consciously aware of what messages they send, or at least not all of them,
or
the variously ways they may be interpreted and understood. So, as with all
messages, but perhaps especially with the more imaginative and creative
ones,
we should try to be careful about what messages we intend to send and may
send anyway, even if we don't intend them that way.
When I did the laundry tonight, I noticed what I believe was a message from
you which you left in my bathroom hamper after you left. I'm not sure
precisely
what message or messages you might have intended to send, or all the
meanings—
explicit and implicit, conscious and unconscious, manifest and latent - of
the
messages that might be interpreted--but, as a psychologist, I have a good
general idea of the various, complex possibilities. In fact, as a
psychologist,
and therefore something of a specialist in the complexity symbolic
communications
and their media--I would have to say that the message(s) you sent me, and
the
specific medium you selected for your particular form of communication here,
is
one of the more imaginative and creative I've experienced. Quite clever and
sophisticated, actually, for all the crudity and offensiveness that might
also be
conveyed (if one interprets natural body functions that way).
Of course, I cannot say I was precisely pleased with you for sending the
message, or, even more so, pleased to receive it. In fact, although you had
no way of knowing this and I do not think you intended it, at it turns out,
receiving your message was, not only surprising, but also especially
embarrassing for me in so far as I first noticed and "received" the message
you'd left for me on my personal undergarment in front of several other
students
of mine, in a public laundromat, which is where I had to take my clothes
when
my washer drier broke down. The humiliating assumptions my students possibly
may have made after seeing your message, thus giggling about their
professor's
large yellow stain which announced my seeming un hygienic indiscretion
apparent lack
of abilities to control my own bladder, only caused me to shudder in further
mortification.
Please don't misunderstand. I am not saying I am angry with you for the
message you sent, or even the way you sent it. Nor am I judging you, as a
person, in any negative way because of it, despite the apparently negative
interpretation one could make of the message itself. I am not even blaming
you, in any way, for the embarrassment I felt about it. Not only could you
not have known or anticipated I would be doing laundry in the laundromat,
and
in front of other students, but you do not know me very well, or my personal
history, and therefor could not have accurately anticipated precisely what
the message would mean to me.
In fact, I doubt that you fully appreciate or understand what all the
message
means, why you sent it, and why you sent it that particular way. That is
not
a negative reflection on you, or your intelligence or understanding in
general. Quite the contrary, although your academic performance doesn't
reflect this fully, I'm convinced you are quite intelligent with a deeper
understanding of things than most students your age. In fact, I think,
other
things aside, the imaginative, creative character of your message and
medium-of-choice confirms how bright and clever you are.
But people can be very bright and very clever, yet very troubled, too. I'm
bright and clever, but I've had my share of troubles, too. And that is why
I
am concerned, and am writing this to you.
I don't want to alarm you, or label you, or even necessarily imply anything
very negative or worrisome in saying this. Everyone has troubles, and
troubles can be effectively handled and resolved, as I was saying in my
earlier email about turning negatives into positives. And, as I indicated
in
that email, analyzing and being objective is an important part of turning
negatives into positives. And being bright and clever helps in analysis and
achieving objectivity, in understanding different perspectives, having
expansive more comprehensive experiences, and gaining growth in
understanding
and knowledge. That is why I think I can be helpful here, for you, in
addressing, understanding and resolving your troubles--your troubles with
Miss Stern, and now the troubles implied in the message(s) you send and the
specific medium you chose to send it.
Because you haven't responded to my email or spoken to me about it further,
I
do not know how things are going with Miss Stern. But, since I haven't
heard
anything further from her either, I'm hopeful things are going better, and
that negative has been turned more positive for you. I hope my email was
helpful with that situation, and I think I can be helpful with the troubles
behind the clothing-message you sent me, in turning that into a positive and
resolving the troubles behind it.
Actually, I think that, as you may or may be aware, you already took a
positive turn by sending the message, as negative as that message may appear
to be. At the very least, you took the initiative. No one asked or told
you
to send that message or send it in that way. So, you took the initiative to
do so yourself, and that is a positive step--a call for help, I think, as at
least part of your message. And, given the specific medium of the message,
a
call to me, personally (even intimately, one might say, given the garment in
question, and the way the message was "expressed" or "written" on that
garment). And, without meaning to sound vain or self-centered here, I think
you made a good choice in who to send that particular message to, on that
particular item of attire as a medium, using that particular fluid tool of
expression.
So, in taking the initiative to send the message in the first place, in
sending it in such an imaginative, creative way, and in being precisely and
appropriately selective in who you sent the message to--even if the message
itself and how you sent it seem negative--all these other things are very
positive in addressing your troubles effectively. Overall, I'm quite
encouraged and hopeful, and think I can be especially helpful, as you seem
to
have anticipated so well.
I think I am a good choice to receive your message, and can be very helpful
for several reasons. First, I think--and I hope I'm not being presumptuous
here--that I was helpful with your situation with Miss Stern--in turning
that
more positive. And I think troubles with Miss Stern are closely related to
the troubles conveyed in your clothing-message.
Second, I am a psychologist, and generally professionally qualified to be
helpful. Of course, I am an academic, research psychologist, not a clinical
psychologist. But that leads me to the third reason I think I was a good
choice to receive your message. Although I don't have professional
experience in clinically treating troubles such as you've indicated, I do
have some personal experience with the kind of troubles indicated by your
message, and most specifically with the particular medium and tool you
selected to communicate your message, as well as with how embarrassing and
humiliating such troubles can be, which makes them even more troubling and
difficult to talk about (which is why I think you chose to send the message
the way you did).
I don't want to get too specific or graphic here, before I've had a chance
to
hear more from you about the message and the troubles behind it. But, as I
suggested when you visited my house to use the bathroom, I had my own
bladder
troubles. And they were very troubling too--very embarrassing and
humiliating, especially during adolescence, which is difficult enough as it
is, as you well know. Well, anyway, I'm saying this--sharing this very
personal, once very troubling, problem I had with you--in the spirit of
sharing what can be very difficult and embarrassing personal issues to
discuss, and in the spirit of turning negatives into positives. I turned
that troubling bladder problem into a big positive for me. In fact, it was
one of the main reasons I became a successful academic, research
psychologist, which I probably would not have, without that problem, and how
I adjusted to it and made it a positive growth experience for me.
So, in this spirit of personal sharing and growth, I hope you'll open up and
share with me and let me help. We can communicate by email, if you'd like,
if you'd prefer that to speaking in person. As I indicated above, email can
often be an emotionally safer and more secure way to openly express
yourself.
But, if you want to talk in person, that would be fine too. The important
thing is to communicate and share, personally and emotionally, not so much
how you choose to do it, although some ways are more appropriate than
others.
Of course, if you choose to continue sending messages the way you sent the
last one, I hope you wait until my washer-dryer is repaired, and I have to
warn you, that I may charge you laundry-duty for my services.
Just joking, of course. Which is another important thing to keep in
mind--how important humor is in putting and keeping troubling things in
perspective and bringing them down to emotionally manageable size. It's
always better if we can laugh about these things and not take them and
ourselves too seriously. I say this, I must confess, as someone who has
always been too serious and humorless--is, you might say, humor-challenged,
but who is taking up the challenge to change and adjust and be better about
letting go, letting the laughter and amusement happen, even if I'm not yet
very good at being humorous myself, and still take myself too seriously.
Lately though, with the way things have been going in class and in the
office
at school, I have been experiencing things--troubles and challenges,
professionally and personally--that have prompted me to attempt to make some
adjustments and changes, especially about humor and amusement, and about the
all-too-serious issue of authority. And this leads me to the last thing I
have to say here, and another reason I think I can be helpful, in this case
as kind of an example or role model.
I said above that I think your troubles with Miss Stern and those indicated
by your clothing-message--the message itself, how you chose to send it and
who you sent it to--are closely interconnected. Again, I hope I'm not
presuming too much here, but I think your main troubles are about the issue
of authority. Certainly, the problems with Miss Stern concern authority,
and
I have problems with her too in that regard.
And, I believe, your clothing-message was essentially a statement about
authority, or rather, your attitude toward it. It was, I think, in a very
imaginative, creative and clever way, your way of invading "the enemy's"
territory, penetrating that territory in the most intimate way, taking
personal
possession of that intimate territory, and saturating, despoiling or fouling
it.
To put it more simply, digging your professor's panties our of her hamper,
and urinating in them was your way of saying to an authority figure, "I can
get to you, on your own territory, uncover your most private, intimate
possessions and show you what I think of you by "pissing"
(pardon the vulgarity) on it and, thereby, you.
Thus, you've just pissed on me, your professor, Pamela Snyder.
Wow.
Of course, as with any message by any medium, their are multiple
interpretations and meanings. But I think that this statement against
authority
is at the center of them for you. Having my own issues with authority
(including Miss Stern, as it turns out) and having been, so to speak, fluent
(or fluid) in the language you've "spoken" to me in--or at least familiar
with the medium as well as the message--I think I can be helpful, if you'll
let me, professionally and personally, even in such intimate matters. So,
perhaps we can be friends, after all. I hope so.
In that spirit, and in hopes to be hearing from you soon, please feel free
to
call me Pamela, just not at school.
Very Sincerely and Understandingly Yours,
(and hopefully your future confidant and friend)
Pamela
_______________________________________________________
Send a cool gift with your E-Card
http://www.bluemountain.com/giftcenter/
