My Lucky Life

Chapter V

The next morning, I woke up early, feeling very good about the how well Sarah handled last night. Her training was going extremely well. I was on cloud nine. My life had never been better and I couldn't imagine how it would get much better.

I felt that tonight was the right night to fuck her. A reward for being such an obedient girl. But not before I punished her for the unauthorized orgasm in the parking lot. Yes, tonight would be allot of fun, but today, I had some important renovations on the house to start.

I had bought a wireless video system a few weeks ago with the intentions of installing it soon. I had been slacking in that department, but now I had the energy to get it done and that was the only thing on my list of 'shit to do'. It was a very advanced system. Small cameras that had unbelievable picture quality. Some cameras even had zoom and pan functions. It all worked on an industrial quality high bandwidth wireless network. I spent the morning setting the network up and testing it. I performed some very severe security tests. The last thing I wanted was anyone intercepting the signal it would be broadcasting. That would be very bad.

I knew a decent amount about computers, but I wanted help from a security expert. I found a guy on the internet who really knows his stuff. This was his job and I felt comfortable asking for his help. He was now securing the files and setting up my wirelesses network so it would be very secure. We spoke on the phone as he was doing his job, and I watched the computer to see what he was doing. Most of the stuff he was uploading were programs he had written for my specific network. After he was done, I sent him the money through a Pay Pal account and hung up.

Next, I went over to the wireless router and unplugged the cable connecting it to the internet. Now if the guru left any backdoors open on the network, he couldn't just connect form the safety of his home. He would have to fly out and sit in front of my house with a transceiver to break in. I thought the possibility of that happening was very remote especially since he didn't know where I lived. The Pay Pal account I used wasn't registered to me and I had caller ID blocked on my house phone.

After I felt good about the security, I had to decide where the cameras would be placed, so I spent the rest of the afternoon placing and testing the cameras. This took much longer than I thought because they all had to be hidden and have a good view. I only got a handful placed before I figured Sarah would call. I cleaned up and spent my time awaiting Sarah watching TV.

She never called.

I went to bed that night a little worried. She had never missed a day and if she did, she had always had very good excuses. The last time she didn't come over, she had to go to an away game to cheer, but she had called me before hand to inform me of the problem. This time I received no notice what-so-ever.

Still, I wasn't too worried as I didn't really expect her to willingly miss time with me. I was quite sure I would find out what the problem was tomorrow after school. This was also an excellent excuse to punish her more. I fell asleep thinking about how I would achieve that and slept soundly.

I awoke in the morning and immediately started back on my camera project. Yesterday had taught me allot about the difficulties of properly hiding cameras. It wasn't so much the fact that hiding them was hard, but trying to hide them while also keeping them in the optimal position to capture any action was really the tough part. Especially the cameras that moved. They were, of course, allot larger than the tiny stationary cameras. I had actually gotten so frustrated with the panning cameras yesterday that I had decided to try and mount them in the ceiling.

Today, I would give it a try. I went down to an audio/video store and browsed through their security department. I found just the right thing. A smoked glass bubble that was five inches in diameter. Next I went to a home improvement store and bought a stud finder, a six foot step ladder and a saw to cut a hole in the ceiling. I had some help from one of the associates and he also suggested that I buy a bit for my drill to drill a pilot hole for my saw. Yeah, I hadn't thought of that, but it makes sense after someone explains it to you. Oh well, that's why construction workers get paid the big bucks.

I got home and decided to try out my hole cutting skills in an area that no one would see. I picked my walk in closet. I removed all the clothes so I wouldn't get little pieces of drywall on them, set up my ladder, found a void and started drilling. Then I used the saw to cut a five inch hole. Next, I mounted the camera using the supplied hardware to the plywood that made up the floor of the next level then screwed down the smoked glass bubble.

I went over to the master computer and tested my setup. The software that came with the setup was first rate. I could chose between any camera and the ones that moved could be manipulated through the use of the mouse. The camera that I had setup could pan 180 degrees in any direction. The picture quality was perhaps better on these cameras than the smaller ones and the smoked glass didn't tint the picture enough for me to really notice. Another advantage of the movable cameras was the fact that they could be set for low light situations, using an infrared light. The smoked glass did interfere with this function. That was a bummer.

Another interesting feature of the software was the fact that you could setup a recording scenario using the software's own motion sensing abilities. The computer would monitor all the cameras and anytime it sensed motion on the screen, it would start recording. The problem with this was after 30 seconds of no motion in a room, it would stop recording. That was likely to happen as Sarah was sure to be restrained in a manner that left her motionless.

I had thought of several ways to overcome this problem. One was to get the biggest hard drives I could get and just continuously record and then erase at the end of a day. I quickly realized that it would be very tedious to comb through all the video every day and save the parts that were good. So, I decided to do it a different way.

At the Audio/video store I had seen an interesting device. It was a thermal detector. It worked off of body heat. Anytime someone was in a room, it would know from the heat given off by that person and trip an alarm. I didn't want to trip an alarm, just the cameras. So, after I finished installing the panning cameras, I started in on some research.

I quickly found what I was looking for. Again, this was an industrial type device, it detected body heat and could be hooked up using Ethernet cable to the central unit and after digging into the camera software, I realized that provisions had been made to setup something like this. This solution looked very promising. I ordered one for each camera.

At the end of the day, I had all the cameras setup and the only thing left was to wait for the triggering devices. I was very happy with the system so far. Now I needed to test it. I waited for my angle's call.

It never came.

This was starting to get very disturbing. I began to think over the past few weeks. Dissecting every day and every activity. It all kept coming back to the night at Sammy's. I thought we had left on decent terms that night. She seemed OK with what had happened after I had a chance to explain it to her. I dropped her off at her house and she kissed me and smiled before she left the car.

Maybe someone recognized her. That would mean big trouble for me. But, if that had happened, it surely wouldn't take two days for the shoe to drop. She surely would have called to give me a heads up. Right? I wasn't sure of anything. The uncertainty only led to more concern and more questions. Have I lost her? Does her mother suspect anything?

I thought through all the scenarios late into the morning hours. Finally I went to sleep out of pure exhaustion.

The next morning I woke and resigned myself to the fact that, for whatever reason, she simply hadn't been around. I felt it wouldn't be productive for me to think about the many possibilities for why it happened, and just decided to concentrate on a strategy.

If she didn't come over because she was having second thoughts, and I called her to ask, it would jeopardize any future dominance I might have over her. I needed to stay strong and not be the first to call in that scenario. If, however, she hadn't called because someone knew....no, she would have found a way to call me. I just didn't think that was likely. Especially since I hadn't had to answered the door for the local police yet. Surely, they would have at least invited me down to the station house for some questioning by now.

I decided that I wouldn't call her. The likelihood that she, for some reason, had cold feet was far greater than any other scenario I felt. Thus, my response would be directed solely at that. I would stay strong and show her who was in control by not giving in to her tantrum. I would not be the first to initiate contact. I would turn the tables on her and make her worry about the lack of contact from me. If she truly wanted to break ties with me, then my calling her wouldn't do any good. If she was trying to gain back some of the initiative in the relationship, then my silence would be a fantastic way to make sure that doesn't happen. I wanted her to know that she needed me more than I needed her, even if it might not be true. Once she realized that, the game would be over.

If it was a game.

The more I thought about possibly losing her, the more depressed I became. She was absolutely perfect and I was sure I would never find anyone who could compare. By Thursday my depression had hit an all time low and I realized this. I decided it was fruitless to whine about the situation. If she wanted me, she would be back. If she didn't I felt there wasn't anything I could do about it and keep my dominance over her.

My dominance. That was my prime requisite. She was a fantastic girl. I knew that, but the relationship would get very stale, very quickly for me if I didn't maintain it. This realization suddenly brought me out of my low state of mind. Yes, there were really only three possibilities here and two of them weren't good.

Possibility one: She broke the relationship off because she just can't handle the demands I place on her. Vary bad.

Possibility two: We didn't break off the relationship because she had some requirements and I gave into them. Shortly thereafter I became bored with her and I broke it off. Just as bad. In this situation I didn't see how I would be able to gain back the dominance over her I had before if she knew I would be willing to concede certain aspects from my prior actions. No, it would inevitably lead to a break up.

Possibility three: After some time to think about it, and me, she came groveling back, begging for forgiveness. Only now she would be even more submissive and pliable. Extremely good.

I was hoping for option three to pan out. In the mean time, I thought of what I might say if she ever called me again. I had to take the initiative and most importantly, I had to make sure she knew how displeased I was with her. If this ever took place, I knew the day would be very emotional for her...and probably me too.

She didn't call me until Saturday.

 

I awoke that morning well before 8:00. I just couldn't sleep. I went down to the pool and swam for 30 minutes, then made some breakfast and sat down in front of the boob tube. At 9:42 she called. I knew it was her from the caller ID on my cell phone. On the fourth ring I answered without emotion.

"Hello Sarah."

"Ummmm...hi." I let the silence hang in the air and she didn't speak for several seconds. Finally "We need to talk."

I thought about this for a few seconds. This was very crucial. From the tone of her voice I knew she wanted to see me again, but I also knew she wanted to talk about what had been happening to her. I felt as though she would try to put restrictions on our relationship and I needed to nip it in the butt right now. Once again I spoke in a flat, professional tone. "That's fine. Be at my house by noon. Don't be late. OK?"

"Wait..uhhh. I don't...Ummm, are you going to pick me up?"

"No."

"But...I don't..... have a way to get over there."

"Well, I'm sure you can figure something out, Sarah. Don't be late." I hung up.

I second guessed myself after I hung up. That may have been a tad too harsh. Well, if it was, it was too late to do anything about it. Still, I couldn't help feeling a little pissed at myself for letting my emotions get hold of me like that. However, if she showed, that action would solidify my dominance. It would be very hard for her to negotiate after she had made such a huge effort to see me.

The doorbell rang at 11:39. I answered it and her beauty nearly took my breath away. She was standing there in a pair of jeans shorts that were cut very high and tight. She had on a red polo shirt that didn't quite cover her belly button. She was wearing brand new white tennis shoes on her feet with white ankle socks. Her hair was in a pony tail and she was even wearing a bit of makeup. The outfit was chosen to excite, but at the same time seem aloof. She was a clever girl.

I resisted the urge to touch her and welcomed her inside. I had a plan of action already thought out. I need to get her in a position of submissiveness before she started. So, as soon as I shut the door I began to speak.

"Sarah, take your shoes and socks off." Again, this was my professional voice and she didn't seem to have any problem with the command. "Are you wearing a bra?" She looked at me with astonishment and then she decided to speak. I stopped her after only a few words. "Answered my question, Sarah." She nodded her head and began to speak. I stopped her again. "Sarah, you will have your say, but first you need to take your bra off and those shorts. You cannot speak until you do that. If you don't want to do that, then you will have to leave. Do you understand?" For the first time ever, I saw her anger. She burst through again with a boisterous protest.

"Wait a minute! All I want to do is talk! We need to get some things straight first..RIGHT NOW!"

I calmly stood there and looked at her for a few seconds then I opened the door back up. "Don't forget your shoes and socks on your way out." She looked determined. I was actually a little scared. It seemed like she was going to walk right out. And in fact, that's just what she did.

She bent down, picked her shoes and socks up and walked right out the door. I wanted to call to her. I wanted to say I was sorry. I wanted to do anything to keep her from walking away from me, but I didn't. I calmly closed the door behind her. I went over to the couch, sat down and in a daze thought about what had just happened. I wanted to cry, but I didn't. It just wasn't meant to be.

At exactly 12:01 she knocked on my door again. I opened it and there she was, sobbing like a three year old. In between sobs she managed to say that she just wanted to talk. I looked at her and told her that she could talk to me, but she would need to do as I told her. I invited her inside and with a small amount of hesitation she walked back into my life.

As she began pulling her shoes off, she told me that's what she wanted to talk about. Now I had confirmation that yes, she was apprehensive about the things I made her do. I quickly shushed her and said that she could talk only when she was in her panties and shirt. Not before.

She continued taking her socks off, all the while quietly sobbing. Next, she reluctantly stood up and took her bra off without ever giving me a peek at anything. Finally she stood there and looked at me and asked the most heartbreaking thing I've ever heard.

"Don't you love me?"

I wasn't sure how to respond. After a few moments I said. "Yes Sarah. I do love you. None of that's changed. And it's not likely to ever change. Nevertheless, you need to do as you're told and take those shorts off."

She stood there for a few moments more. Her eyes were begging me. At this point I knew she was going to comply, and she knew she would comply. I believe she also realized that she had just lost the battle. She simply couldn't live without me and she would be willing to do anything I said. But that didn't stop her from screwing up her determination to try and gain back some initiative. Only, that wouldn't happen until after she stripped down to her panties.

Her hand made a slow, reluctant trip down to the button on the shorts. She fumbled with it for a few seconds and got it undone. After it was unbuttoned, she pleaded again. I just stood there, with my hand on the door handle. She slowly unzipped and dropped her shorts. I really wanted to touch her pussy now, but maintained control.

She was wearing a pair of tiny red silk thong panties that I had bought for her. This surprised me and made everything even more clear. She had come over here wearing panties she knows I liked. Panties that showed off her body. Most of all, they were panties that would most assuredly have an emotional attachment to me. I was sure she thought she would come over here, make her demands, then after I had excepted, she would seduce me with those panties and we would have makeup sex. The first time she would ever make love. I blew her plan all to hell and back. I had to suppress a smile while at the same time resist the urge to bend her over my couch and fuck her like the tasty little tart she is.

She stepped out of her shorts and covered her panties with her hands. I walked over to the living room and she followed. I sat down on the couch and she began to sit also. I stopped her and told her to kneel in the middle of the living room. She protested again. I pointed to the floor about five feet in front of me and snapped my fingers. She closed her eyes and reluctantly moved. Finally, I had her in the position I wanted. She was in her tight cotton polo shirt in the tiny red thong panties I had bought her, sitting on her heels on my living room floor. Perfectly submissive. I waited for her to talk.

"I..I've been thinking allot about you and me. I...Some of the things you do to me don't make me feel right." I let her continue. "After the night at the..club....I...felt weird. I felt dirty. I thought about what I had done and some of the stuff that I've done before that and it just doesn't feel right." I interjected.

"But you do enjoy yourself while it's happening."

"Well...um...a little. But.."

"No, not a little. You cum for me like a little tramp. You can't get enough. I know you better than you know yourself Sarah" I said. "NO!.. I mean, that's not it. I..yes, I do c-c-cum when you..you know." Her face was getting red. It was very embarrassing for me to point this out. She wants to be strong here, but her body has betrayed her too many times. "But, I don't always feel right when I do. It's¡­ it's not like a normal thing and I'm just not very comfortable. I mean, even during. I..yes, you're right. I do cum, but I always feel strange about it when I do. When you make me do those things."

"I see." She wasn't quite finished yet.

"I mean, can't we have a more normal relationship? We can still play I mean, just not so...so, well, you know."

"No, I don't explain it to me."

She looked away. Her face was beat red. "Well, I don't like the thing with the girls. That's just way too weird for me. And, really, I don't like the...you know...ummm....the butt things. I mean, it would be fine except it hurts and I get kind of scared. But, the thing I really didn't like, was the embarrassment in that room...you know..in front of those girls....and Mr. Epstien. I don't know, the whole experience....it...well, I just don't want to do things like that anymore. I mean...we can...you know still have fun. Like, you can tie me up and...well...it's Ok if you spank me and stuff. But, you know...I just want to have some normal time with you too. I mean, you're always wanting me to do things and we never just sit and talk anymore. I guess, I just...I don't want the things you do to be sooo...you know, 24-7. And, I mean...you...well...it's like I said before. I like some of the stuff we do. I mean, you know it's kind of fun and all, but the night at the club was...not nice. I want to have a more normal relationship with you. That's all."

"You seemed to be Ok with it when you left. And you seemed Ok with it while we were there. So, what happened?" I was really interested in this answered. It would definitely be good to know what happened to make her all of a sudden freak out on me like that.

"I mean... yes. I know. I..I don't know. When I get..you know.. horny..I .. Well, I guess it's like this. I mean, you brought me there and then made me do those things with that other girl and I was..yeah...I mean I was horny but not because...Oh I don't know...I mean, I didn't really like it. It was disgusting."

This was very interesting. I had no idea that she felt this way. Had I been reading her wrong all along? So, even though she gets horny and gets off on it, she still hates doing that stuff? I had to ask. "So, even after our talk, you felt shame? Shame at what your body did? You couldn't control yourself even though you hated what was happening?"

I had hit the nail on the head. The word shame seemed to be exactly the word she was looking for because her response was very animated. I could see the relief spread across her face that I understood in better terms than she did about what had happened. "YES, that's it exactly!"

"I see." I got up and went into the kitchen and she began to speak again. I told her to be quiet. I had to think about this.

This was very interesting. I thought her inhibitions were much less than most other girls. Obviously they were, but not nearly as much as I had assumed. However, she could have stopped everything we had done over the past few weeks dead in their tracks. She didn't and there were two reasons, I felt, why she didn't stop it.

One was clearly she had been having fun experimenting initially. She got off on everything I've had her do and some of it was actually fun for her. Clearly the light bondage was a huge turn on. Well, it seems everything was a turn on. But she could compartmentalize the arousal from the fun. Yes, that was interesting. But still, initially, I had gone slow enough in her introduction to make her realize that she was at least into the light stuff. That had facilitated her acceptance of some of the dirtier things I had made her do. I would bet my fortune that she was a very confused little girl until the night at the club.

The second reason, and this was probably the biggest reason, she didn't stop it was because she adored me. I could tell whenever I looked into her eyes. She worshipped the ground I walked on. Suddenly I realized that there probably wasn't anything she wouldn't do to gain my praise and acceptance. This was more than likely a product of her youth. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that 15 year old girls come with a lot of insecurities about who they are, what they want and mostly about acceptance in society. She desperately wanted my acceptance. Yes. I realized, she wanted me very badly. I would be the catch of her life. I was her knight in shining armor.

Well, for whatever reason, she had just opened up to me in a way that she never had before. She was completely honest and I loved her for it. But, her honesty would come back to bite her.

I guess you could say I'm an asshole. That's fine, I'll take the criticism. After all, I was going to use this very open and personal information against her to mold her into the very things she was arguing against. I knew I could do this because I knew she already lost. She lost because she was kneeling in her cute little red panties with no bra on, in the middle of my living room floor, patiently awaiting my return. No, she would do the things she hated precisely because of her insecurities. She would do the things she hated because she desperately wanted me to accept her. She would do the things she hated out of love.

As I thought this out, I walked around to the kitchen door and looked at her. She was getting very uncomfortable. and very nervous. I walked over to the couch and sat down. Finally I answered. "Sarah, I'm not looking for a normal relationship. I can only promise that you will have my undying affection. But, I will not change the nature of our relationship. This leaves you with only one recourse. You can leave me." I let that hang in the air for a few moments.

Finally I said, "But I know, and you know, that will never happen. Just as the sun will rise tomorrow, you will never leave me. You will never find another man as exciting, as confident, a man as good as me. You know that don't you." With tears welled up in her eyes, she nodded her head. "You must understand this, Sarah. You knew it the second you walked in my door that you would continue to do whatever I ask. Didn't you?"

"Yes." she choked out.

"Yes, that's exactly it. You will be the one to submit to whatever my desires are. Even my most depraved fantasies wont be turned down by you. Will they?" She shook her head. "Say it."

"No Sir. They...won't."

"Even if you don't particularly like it, you will still do it, because you know it pleases me. And that's your greatest pleasure. That's your purpose in this relationship. To please me. More than anything in life, right now you want to make me happy." She was full on sobbing now and nodding her head in the affirmative at every sentence. She was truly broke and resigned to her place in my life. She now realized that no matter what I wanted her to do, even the most disgusting thing she could think of, she would do it. That realization freed her soul and terrified her mind all at once.

The emotion of the situation finally got to her and she fell forward clinging to my ankle pleading for my forgiveness. 'Please take her back. She was going to be a good girl, she promised'. At that point a big weight had been lifted off my chest. I felt even better than I had the morning after the club. I could not suppress a grin, but it didn't matter. She was now kissing my shoe, all the while begging me for forgiveness and promising to make it up to me.

As she knelt there prostrate before me, It began to sink in that our relationship had changed. All along I had been under the assumption that our journey was a very mutual one. That she enjoyed the experiences and looked forward to the next one. I had been wrong. In actuality most of what we did was not to her liking. Ah sure, it had started out fun, with a little light bondage and spanking. She was into that. But, after the night at the club she realized how far the rabbit hole went and she tried to put the brakes on. From now on I would have to lead her around with a firm hand and conviction in my heart. She was no longer a willing submissive.

This made me realize that now I was in essence playing a game of blackmail with her. I was using her emotions as my currency. Her love, her adoration, her idolization against her. This put a whole new spin on things and actually piqued my curiosity about the game. Oh, this would make things much more fun.

Yes, I guess you're right. I'm an asshole. So be it.